On the plane home:

I literally just woke up from sleeping and thought to myself, what the hell am I doing going home? 

There are soo many thoughts and emotions going through my head right now.. I'm really worried about reverse culture shock and all the changes that have taken place at home; friends moving away, going back to school, new girlfriends, boyfriends, different living situations, etc...

But I'm also worried about what is to come of me in the fall. I've just gone around the world, and I'll be damned if I come back and live in Brunswick for another year.  I need to save money though, and pay off my little debt from this wonderful trip.

So I could work in northeast Ohio, live at home a bit, then ideally find a flat with a friend.. in one of the cooler areas of Cleveland or Akron.

I've really been considering working at an international school in Europe, but understand that it may be too late to find one of those positions.

Or if I find no jobs anywhere, not all will be lost, because I'm totally up for going back to Asia and teaching some English.

I really would rather teach science though.

Wants always change, and I think I'll be happiest if I do what I want at the moment I want to. 

So many times we act and do things because it's what you think you're "supposed" to do.. Other people expect you to live your life a certain way, society expects you to live a certain way.  Don't get me wrong though, I think that those who go from high school to college to work to marriage to children to carrier and family can still be happy..  I just think that they may also miss out on some of the best learning experiences you could ever have.  Experiences that test your fear, your comfort zone, charade and language skills (Hah),.experiences that force you to truly depend on yourself, in turn causing you to learn about yourself, change what you don't like, and appreciate what you do. 

Travelling also allows you to be a more all around person, to be more loving and accepting of other people and cultures, and of yourself.

I truly believe in getting to know the world, and I truly plan to keep on doing it.

So, don't be surprised.

<3 M

A bittersweet ending: pros and cons of going home

Things I'm excited about:
Family and friends.
Proper, clean, toilets.
My comfy bed with hopefully no bugs. :) 
Getting my hair healthy again.
Opening my mouth in the shower.
A hair dryer.
Using water to brush my teeth.
Soft toilet paper.
Toilet paper in general lol.
Having a car again.
I'm excited to really start mountain biking, climbing, getting better at yoga and meditation, and just following through with things I say I want to do in general.
Seeing/petting dogs and knowing that more times than not, they have a home and don't have flees.
Learning a new language; German or Spanish.
Making money again.

Things I'm not too excited about:
Reverse culture shock.
American accents.
Missing travelling.
Being a workaholic (to pay off my travelling debt)= not much of a summer.
People being utterly obsessed with being on their phones.
Not having my own flat right away.
Interviews.
Pressures of society.
Pressures from other people.

Things I'm really going to miss:
Asians.
Geckos, and the sound geckos make, and that laugh thing too.
Tuk tuks.
Cheap prices.
Temples.
Monks.
Taking my shoes off at every entrance.
The language barrier, charades is fun!
Meeting new people everyday, and being instant bffs.
Motorbiking around beautiful scenery.
Banana trees, tropical jungles, mountains, & the terrain and fauna in general.
Kids screaming hello everytime you walk by or ride past them on a motorbike.
Cheap drinks; fruit shakes, bubble tea, and beer.
Foreign languages.
Feeling normal with no makeup on.
Accents.
Fresh made.. everything!
Foods without a shit ton of chemicals.
Adding a bracelet to my wrist every few weeks.
Learning different ways of saying: hello, goodbye, how are you, and cheers.

The #1 thing I'm worried about:
A job for the fall.. stay or go: local or international school? Out of state or in state? In the US or outside? English or science?  Or volunteer?

So many things are unknown, but like a travel mate said to me about a month or so ago, I'm excited to see where I end up in a few months..

Cheers

<3 M

#blogprobs

I really really need to catch up..